pay the piper

You know the story....a guy that plays a pipe can get the rats outta town; the towns folk dont pay him so he plays a tune and takes all their children away.. I done worse..

Update: quick ass nutshell.... got a job last year finally. Crappy job running a kitchen for a guy that watched Food Network to many times and thought he could own a restaurant.. he lost (and I quit last month.. after a knee blow out over the summer that needed surgery)... Rolled my truck onto its roof about a year ago and the cops were amazed that there was even a survivor.. I walked away with a small cut on my hand from supporting myself on the roof (kinda.. more like "in the shattered glass where the sun roof used to be" so I could relieve the seatbelt pressure while suspended upside down... I finished my smoke before starting the evacuation process :) sent Delores an email too

3 days later, I got some REALLY fucked up news.. I was gonna be a dad... by a friend of mine who I got drunk with one to many times.. He's 3 months old now.. I just put him down to bed and currently smell like partially digested baby formula... and I get to look forward to all this again.

Yup

Another one coming any day now.....

Chick I got set up with shortly after the accident and a few days after Baby Momma 1 (lets call her Brenda) went FB public with the baby news.. It took some explaining and all but, shit, we're adults, shit happens, there's a baby coming and I'm gonna be a dad (again) and while unexpected, he's gonna be loved and cared for and I'm gonna be part of his life (Brenda even has a BF now..)

Well... New chick (howabout..Tammy).. Tammy is having some understandable issues with dating a guy who has a kid on the way with some other woman and inadvertantly tells me.. by sending me a text message intended for her friend. I can understand all this and her wanting some "normalcy" and I didnt think anyone would be able to handle this,, and it wasnt fair to her regardless.. So I decided to break up with her.....

She comes over this past summer and looks nervous. Im thinking its cuz shes uncomfortable about the text thing... im a little on edge cuz I'm about to dump her.. I let her talk first and I'M THE ONE WHO GOT FLOORED!!!!

"I'm pregnant"

I shit you not.. I was about to dump her, she tells me shes knocked up... I even told her that I was about to drop her.. I still am but that fucked up my world in ways I cant even describe..

Yup.. A 3 month old I just put down to bed (Brenda is my room mate now, we have separate rooms but share the parenting... and yes, she knows that there is another one coming) and a phone with the ringer set to high cuz I could get a call at any moment in the next week to go and start this whole fucking process again...

Im retired.. Im fucking retired (pun intended)

funny part about it all... Brenda's concern was that her being knocked up would ruin my chances with Delores. When I told Brenda about Tammy, she said "you fucked up all your chances with that girl"...

She's right