She has occupied my thoughts for nearly 2 decades.....half of my life.. That has never stopped and I have come to the conclusion that it never will. It is just part of my daily existence; just like my knees cracking and popping every morning and giving out occasionally. Just like my shoulder not working like it used to because of the dislocations, like my sinus issues from the countless broken noses and the nightmares that still haunt me from time to time. Those are part of me, just like she is. It all has to be lived with.
My ability to rationalize:... You would have been right about that last year. A lot has changed since then. There was, back then, the euphoria of the reconnection and it could really be better described as obsession. And that obsession was in both directions from both sources. Trust me, we have calmed down quite a bit since then. There used to be hundreds.. HUNDREDS..of emails, texts, IM chats, and FB comments every day. Now, its just a few emails and some days there are none. Trust me, I can rationalize just fine now. The feelings, however, cannot be just turned off.
She has taken over my blog:
NOPE... couldn't be more wrong there. She deleted hers. I was disappointed when she told me because there is now a lot of background information that is lost to any newcomers. She is part of this story and always will be, because she is the reason that this was started. I made her a co author by my own choice... trust me, she was not exactly keen on the idea
OOPS.. READ THIS FIRST
Mar 7 (3 days ago)
OG
to Delores
I just sent you an invitation that I didnt mean to send without checking how it worked first...
I made you an author on mine if you are interested and then realized that I have no clue how you have your profile for blogging set up....
If you are interested, but have a different Gmail that you used for that, I will need that one instead
OG
I don't know why.. but for some reason, it seems like a good idea right now
Mar 8 (3 days ago)
Delores
to OG
OK i'll take a look
Delores
to OG
Mar 8 (3 days ago)
but why do you want me to be a co-author? it totally changes the meaning and purpose of your blog. i would rather be a spectator.
OG
to Delores
I don't know why.. It just seems like not such a bad idea for you to have the option.. It still feels ok,,
Hey, you accepted it :) I can remove you if you would prefer. But NO ADMIN privileges... thats mine. hehehehe
Delores
i posted. i feel like shit, but it was honest.
OG
to Delores
I'll look in a bit. I'm sure that its nothing that I don't already
know or can't handle.
I'm still not sure why I thought it a good idea for you to have that
option, but you obviously don't think it to bad an idea either.
I will only ask the obvious....don't hit me with any crushing blows there.
I will take you off if you ever get uncomfortable with that power, you
just have to ask. And will tell you if I need to do it for my own
reasons
Delores
to OG
Even when being delicate, there's a fine line when dealing with emotions. And in the end, I think I'll be the one who receives the crushing blow, not you.
OG
to Delores
That is a very real possibility.
And it may even come from me; time will tell
I don't know if its an irony or not, but you and I now have one more
thing in common in this fucked up triangle...which is probably more of
a hexagon..I would need to sit down and ponder it if I really cared
about the geometric shape
Delores
to OG
you could always go after his wife? you may even know her, she went to [rival high school]. [her name].
OG
to Delores
She worked at [place I used to work long ago] and drove a white Mustang...... and it's worse than that.. she was [name on list] back then. (if it's the one that I know). Blond.... not very bright?
I'm filling the gap in my resume. would you be willing to give it a once over?
OG
to Delores
I cant believe that we actually just said that to each other.. that was weird
Delores
to OG
I will take a look. not sure about the mustang or the blond hair, but she is very smart. she's an attorney with a JD from [prestigious law school].
OG
to Delores
phew... not her. the one I know is dumber than a post
We actually had that conversation two days ago.
As far as the physical appearance of my blog... that is my doing and it is a work in progress. It was kind of boring so I decided to add some color, and I am still working on some graphics as well.
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