Wednesday, March 11, 2009

decisions decisions

I need to decide if I'm going to wait it out. The open endedness is the hardest part. I know I can hold out for 6 months. I could hold out for a year if I knew that was when I could be with her. But it's unknown.

We had talked about this before and she is worth the wait, but the last thing in the world I want to do is waste my life. I've wasted enough of it. And if they are REALLY going to try to work this out (which I personally don't think will happen) I need to be out of the picture.

What happens in six months when she emails me and says it's all great. I've lost six months of life.

What happens if I move on and she emails me in six months asking for my address, but I'm involved with someone else? I couldn't just drop someone because "I was waiting for this opportunity and just killing time with you". That would be horrible. But i have waited half my life for her.

I'll decide in a month when I should make a decision

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